#127: Are you there God? It's me, Margaret by Judy Blume

A period drama

This was written during the 2023 WGA and SAG-AFTRA strikes. Without the labor of the writers and actors currently on strike, the movie discussed here wouldn’t exist.

Hello readers,

My wife and I recently summitted the Mt. Everest of adulthood and made new friends with another couple. It helped that our kids were friends with their kids first, but it’s not a given that you will get along with your children’s friends’ parents.

I was this close to messing it all up when I mentioned to them one evening at dinner that I, as a 38-year-old man, had recently read Are You There God? It’s me, Margaret. They each gave me a look. “Isn’t that a book about pre-teens getting their periods? I read that in middle school — why are you reading it now?”

Luckily, I was prepared. There are occasions when spending too much time on IMDb has its benefits, and this was one of them. “The book was published in 1970 but has never been adapted to a film until now. Rachel McAdams is in it and Abby Ryder Forston plays Margaret! (She was in a Marvel movie if you didn’t know, Ant-Man’s daughter). It’s written and directed by Kelly Fremon Craig who wrote and directed Edge of Seventeen with Hailee Steinfeld, have you seen that? (Hailee Steinfeld is in that Marvel show Hawkeye if you didn’t know). And did I mention the book was published in 1970 and has never been adapted?!”

Oh yeah, I could tell they were impressed.

The truth is the movie itself saved our friendship. Last weekend our new friend told us she watched it on a plane and loved it. Now we laugh about our friendship’s origin story when they ask me if I’ve read any more period books.

A masterful adaptation

This was one of my most anticipated adaptations of the year. When I read the book back in January, I related to the mixed faith family. Margaret’s father and paternal grandmother are Jewish and her mother and maternal grandparents are Christian. Her parents have decided to let her decide what religion to be when she grows up. A brave choice, but not always easy for Margaret.

Being raised by two Christian parents, I did not have Margaret’s religious angst growing up. Being in a mixed faith relationship now, I think often about my sons and what they should “be.”

The book has a scene where Margaret’s grandparents insist that she’s Christian and a separate scene where her grandmother insists she’s Jewish. The film combines these two scenes into one awkward post-dinner encounter with all the adults arguing in front of Margaret.

It’s powerful as she tells them to stop fighting. In the book, Margaret’s internal dialogue says:

I didn’t want to listen anymore. How could they talk that way in front of me! Didn’t they know I was a real person—with feelings of my own!

Movie Margaret writes to her teacher that religion makes people fight and that praying hasn’t made things better. Book Margaret writes a report that says maybe kids should be told what religion they are starting at a young age.

In my favorite scene, Rachel McAdams, who plays Margaret’s mother, apologizes and then just sits on the couch and holds her. “I don’t feel like talking. Want to just sit for a minute?” It is a moment of empathy and love that I’ll try and remember.

I hope you get a chance to see this sweet movie. If you have already, I’d love to know your thoughts.

Thanks for reading,

Kyle

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